Helpless Not Hopeless

There are many moments in parenthood where mom and dad feel completely helpless.  Common examples include when your child is sick, when someone hurts their feelings, when they get hurt, or when they refuse to follow a certain behavior request by the parents.  Or when your daughter spends more than an hour coughing in the wee hours of the morning on her birthday.

Aria has one of the worst coughs she has had in her entire four years.  It really seemed to begin about 4 am on her birthday.  She woke up coughing and could not get settled back down.  We got water, Vicks, the vaporizer, propped her up on another pillow and none of it seemed to help.  And the birthday streamers and Minnie and Daisy dangly things in her doorway were not in the way at all for the 14 trips in and out of her room.  At 4 am.

Once I knew we had done everything we could to try to help her with the cough, I laid in my bed praying over and over and over, "God, please help her stop coughing.  Give her rest.  Don't let her feel yucky on her birthday."

I felt completely helpless.

I wanted to go in Aria's room and remove the cough from her chest and place it in mine.  I wanted to take on her pain and suffering so she didn't have to feel those things.  First of all, I remember my parents, my dad in particular, wanting to do the same for me when I was young.  My dad would endure all kinds of suffering if it meant I didn't have to.  Or Aria.  It is amazing how becoming a parent helps you understand your own parents so much more.

And then there is the great parallel.  Jesus took on my suffering so I didn't have to experience it.

Aria's suffering wasn't by choice, but a virus that infiltrated her body.  But my sin is something I choose.  I deserve punishment and suffering.  Jesus took it for me anyway.  That's why I am not hopeless.

I know Aria's cold will eventually go away.  I know her suffering won't last forever.  But in the middle of the night, lacking sleep and not being able to do anything about it, it is easy for me to lose sight of that.  On night two I got frustrated and angry.  But then I realized that God is in control and He would give me the love and endurance I needed to care for my girl, whatever that might entail.

Suffering from a cough in the middle of the night is not fun.  Living as a saint who sins isn't always great, either.  But I have hope in Jesus Christ and eternal life with Him someday.  And when that day comes none of us will have to feel helpless again.