Recently I got to read and study So Long Insecurity with my awesome friends! What a book! The main idea is that women, in general, are insecure. We have many things that cause or spark our insecurity and there are many places it comes from. But we don't have to be insecure! A verse that is repeated throughout the book is Proverbs 31:25a: "She is clothed with strength and dignity." God gave each one of us the strength and dignity to be who He made us and to not have to worry about what someone else thinks.
There are so many lessons I took away from this book. I can't begin to write them all. I will highlight a few of the ones that hit me the hardest.
1. Fear is a huge part of insecurity. Moore suggests when I feel an outbreak of insecurity I should stop and ask myself, "what am I afraid of?" If I can get to the root of my fear, then I can ward away the insecurity.
2. To go along with that, Psalm 112: 7-8: "[She] will have no fear of bad news; [her] heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord. [Her] heart is secure, [she] will have no fear; in the end [she] will look in triumph on [her] foes." I don't have to have fear because God will take care of me. Moore encourages her readers to "trust God period." Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love Him." Sometimes it is really hard, but here is another phrase you can say to yourself, "Lord, I don't know if I can trust (fill in the blank of your worldly fear), but I can trust You!"
3. There are three things that can help me stop feeling insecure. First, I need to stop comparing myself to other women, other moms, other Christians, etc. I try not to, but it is a constant battle. Second, I need to realize that other women are imperfect people, just like myself. I pick out a perfect characteristic of a friend or acquaintance and I think that person has no problems and I can't live up to her. In fact, she does have problems, just maybe not ones I choose to see. Third, in the opposite sense, I need to stop pointing out the insecurities of others. People have bad days. Kids scream, cry and throw tantrums in Target. That doesn't tell the whole story. If I don't focus on others' insecurities, I won't end up making them my own.
4. Psalm 84:1, "How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty!" This means me! I am the dwelling place of the Lord and it is time I start seeing myself for the beautiful woman he made me.
5. I already knew this, but I have a living, breathing almost two-year-old little girl who will be watching me to learn how to become a secure woman. How can I teach her if I'm not there myself?
6. Quote from Beth Moore, "Those of us who have struggled with chronic insecurity(that is me) have made a life practice out of attaching it to every other negative emotion we feel." I had never really thought about how I attach emotions to everything. Moore gives some great examples, "You can hurt my feelings, criticize me and even be right, embarrass me, or intimidate me, but you cannot have my security." God gave all of us our security and we don't have to give it away when others hurt us! This was a big lesson for me. When someone does hurt me in those ways, I immediately think I am less of a person. But, Beth Moore pointed out to me that I can be hurt without being insecure.
Those are the biggest points that stuck with me. I could certainly provide several more ideas that I really enjoyed from the book, but I think you should read it yourself...if you are a woman. Not that a guy couldn't read the book, but it is written for women. Seriously, whether you think insecurity is a big problem or just a tiny one, read this book and it will lift your spirits and give you some encouragement to be who God made you.
The only complaint I have about the book is that I felt it spent a little too much time on where insecurity comes from. As I was reading, I could relate to so many of the things she said about why women are insecure, but I kept thinking, "so how do I fix it?" Eventually she got to it and I appreciated all the advice in the last few chapters, especially the specific Scripture references.
I'm not so great at writing concise book reviews. It is hard for me. But, I can give you my thoughts and I can give you my praise of the book. I definitely recommend you check it out!
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